Female Bartender ‘Tricks’ A Male Customer Who Harassed Her, Her Coworker Says ‘This Is Why Men Say Women Are Manipulative’
The aftermath of Sarah Everard’s tragic murder sparked a much-needed conversation about women’s safety and victim-blaming. And while the UK has found itself in a series of demonstrations against violence targeting women, more and more women are coming out with their alarming experiences on social media that document the sheer level of unwanted male attention, harassment, and fear they go through.
And one woman on Twitter who goes by the nickname Live Laugh Unhinged has recently shared her dreadful experience of being physically harassed by a male customer. “I used to bartend and would often be completely alone at the bar at night,” she said and proceeded to share the moment the man went as far as touching her inappropriately, which caused her lasting psychological damage.
But it was her male co-worker’s reaction to the whole ordeal that left Twitter users divided, to say the least. Let’s see the story in full right below that will surely make us pause and reflect on violence against women and the flawed ways our society sometimes deals with it.
A former bartender shared what it was like being sexually assaulted by a male customer only to be told by her male colleague she was sending the wrong message
Image credits: AntGor (not the actual photo)
This is the distressing story she shared on Twitter
Image credits: kaL12578
Image credits: kaL12578
Image credits: kaL12578
Image credits: kaL12578
Image credits: kaL12578
Image credits: kaL12578
Image credits: kaL12578
Virtually all young women in the UK have been subjected to sexual harassment, according to a survey from UN Women UK, which warns that most women have lost faith that the abuse will be dealt with. 97% of female respondents aged 18 to 24 said that they had been sexually harassed. Meanwhile, 80% of women of all ages stated they experienced sexual harassment in public spaces.
The Guardian reported that the YouGov survey, which surveyed more than 1,000 women, exposed “a damning lack of faith in the UK authorities’ desire and ability to deal with sexual harassment—96% of respondents did not report incidents, with 45% saying it would not change anything.”These included reports of women being groped, followed, and coerced into sexual activity.
Claire Barnett, the executive director of UN Women UK, called the situation “a human rights crisis,” and said that “It’s just not enough for us to keep saying ‘this is too difficult a problem for us to solve’—it needs addressing now.”
The story has resonated with many people on Twitter and this is what they had to comment on it
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Previously, Bored Panda talked to a representative of Plan International UK, which is part of the #CrimeNotCompliment campaign together with their partner Our Streets Now. They said that ordinary people that take the smallest kind of action make a real difference in fighting violence against women in public spaces.
“If anyone witnessed someone being harassed, a quick check-in afterwards, or an acknowledgment that the girl has a right to feel safe and not to be harassed, can make her feel better about her experience,” they told us.
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This, of course, doesn’t mean that structural inequalities that dwell on fundamental levels of our society don’t play a role. In fact, it’s these that “allow this public sexual harassment to happen in the first place.”
According to Rose Caldwell, the CEO for Plan International: “All women and girls should feel safe in public spaces, yet they still continue to face harassment every day. They’re being followed, shouted at, touched, and groped—and it needs to stop.”
Caldwell insists that all forms of public sexual harassment should be criminalized without reservations so that women can have a life lived without fear, something we all deserve on a basic human level.
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It all makes me angry. But, that comment from merder kitten? She was so smart and so brave to get her assailant to hand her the inhaler, and to have the doc make such a bullshit comment, my god. Let's face it ,having an un-needed puff of ventolin is not in the same league as doubling up on the days insulin. What a c*unt.
That infuriated me particularly as well. What a stupid w*anker. As you say it all does. The comment where she says 'I no longer wear my hair down because he made it a point to touch it' That's because grabbing hair is a method of physical restraint as much as anything else.
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Could we change the heading of this from "hit on in a creepy way" to "sexually assaulted", please? Hitting on some one doesn't involve grabbing, or hands down pants, hair stuff. Sorry not sorry, BP, calling you out!
Support this 100%. Creepy is a euphemism. Let's be blatant. He sexually assaulted this woman and Bored Panda are not right to use language that potentially minimises the offence in any way.
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People often say the reactions are "fight or flight." It's not. It's "fight, flight, or freeze". Even if you think that you would turn into a kickpunching fighting machine if you were threatened, you don't really know until you're there. The goal is survival and escaping "unharmed" from a highly dangerous situation. She succeeded.
In full it is (with a few variations on the same theme) Fight, Flight, Freeze or Appease. She chose to appease and she made absolutely the right choice in a terrifying and difficult situation.
Load More Replies... It all makes me angry. But, that comment from merder kitten? She was so smart and so brave to get her assailant to hand her the inhaler, and to have the doc make such a bullshit comment, my god. Let's face it ,having an un-needed puff of ventolin is not in the same league as doubling up on the days insulin. What a c*unt.
That infuriated me particularly as well. What a stupid w*anker. As you say it all does. The comment where she says 'I no longer wear my hair down because he made it a point to touch it' That's because grabbing hair is a method of physical restraint as much as anything else.
Load More Replies... Could we change the heading of this from "hit on in a creepy way" to "sexually assaulted", please? Hitting on some one doesn't involve grabbing, or hands down pants, hair stuff. Sorry not sorry, BP, calling you out!
Support this 100%. Creepy is a euphemism. Let's be blatant. He sexually assaulted this woman and Bored Panda are not right to use language that potentially minimises the offence in any way.
Load More Replies... People often say the reactions are "fight or flight." It's not. It's "fight, flight, or freeze". Even if you think that you would turn into a kickpunching fighting machine if you were threatened, you don't really know until you're there. The goal is survival and escaping "unharmed" from a highly dangerous situation. She succeeded.
In full it is (with a few variations on the same theme) Fight, Flight, Freeze or Appease. She chose to appease and she made absolutely the right choice in a terrifying and difficult situation.
Load More Replies...
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